Beyond Gifts and Traditions

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As the year draws to a close and the chill of winter settles in, a familiar warmth begins to envelop our hearts and homes. Christmas, a holiday celebrated by millions around the world, invites us to reflect on its deeper meanings beyond the surface-level festivities. Have you ever paused to consider what Christmas truly represents? While its religious and spiritual significance is paramount for many, the holiday has evolved into a rich tapestry of cultural celebrations, each thread woven with themes of goodwill, compassion, and community. If you allow me with this exploration, we will delve into the profound essence of Christmas and ponder how we can transform this season into a meaningful moment in our lives.

At its core, Christmas is a celebration of the birth of Jesus Christ, a figure whose teachings of love, compassion, and forgiveness resonate across cultures and religions. For Christians, this holiday is a time of spiritual reflection, prayer, and connection with the divine. The nativity scene, with its humble beginnings in a stable, serves as a powerful reminder of the beauty found in simplicity and the importance of humility, while reflecting on how Jesus came into the world.

However, Christmas has also transcended its religious roots to become a cultural phenomenon. It is a time when families gather, communities come together, and traditions are passed down through generations. From the twinkling lights that adorn our homes to the carols that fill the air, the holiday season is infused with a sense of joy and togetherness for most people. Yet, amidst the hustle and bustle of shopping, decorating, and planning festive meals, we must ask ourselves: what is the true essence of this celebration?

In a world increasingly dominated by consumerism, it is easy to think the spirit of Christmas is about the act of gift-giving. The pressure to buy the perfect present or to outdo last year’s holiday haul can overshadow the more profound aspects of this season. While gifts can bring joy, they often lack the lasting significance that comes from genuine human connection.

I remember growing up with a real tree and all blue Christmas lights, globes and tinsel decorating that tree. I understand deeply that I was very blessed to grow up with those memories. There were people in the neighborhood that had much less. I will forever thank my parents for reminding me that we were lucky, asking what it meant to me and what about the other people that had less.

This Christmas, what would happen if we shifted our focus from material possessions to the gift of presence. (yes, I know some of you are already) The most meaningful moments often arise from shared experiences—gathering around the dinner table, sharing stories, or simply enjoying each other’s company. The laughter of loved ones, the warmth of a shared meal, and the comfort of familiar traditions create memories that linger long after the holiday season has passed.

This also reminds me of Willie Williams. (permission granted to use his name) Sadly, Willie is no longer with us. Many years ago, when I co-owned Varment Guard, Willie came to work with our company and over time through conversation and observation I came to understand that there were some addictions present and his struggles were often. Willie and I became close over that time. That Christmas I talked with my wife and suggested we invite him for dinner and gifts. I want to make very clear I did not do this because I was trying to save him. He became my friend. For the next 7 years he came to family celebrations, until he could not anymore and I missed him deeply.

Consider the impact of a heartfelt conversation with a friend or a family member you haven’t seen in a while. These moments of connection can be far more valuable than any physical gift. By prioritizing relationships over materialism, we can cultivate a deeper sense of belonging and community, which is at the heart of the Christmas spirit.

Acts of Kindness and Compassion!

Another profound aspect of Christmas is its emphasis on goodwill and compassion. The holiday season serves as a reminder to extend our hearts and hands to those in need. Whether through volunteering at a local shelter, donating to a charity, or simply reaching out to someone who may be feeling lonely, acts of kindness can have a ripple effect that transforms lives.

In many cultures, the act of giving is central to the Christmas celebration. However, it is essential to recognize that giving does not always have to be material. Sometimes, the most impactful gifts are those that come from the heart—offering your time, listening ear, or a helping hand. This season, let us embrace the spirit of giving by seeking out opportunities to uplift others. Remember Willie.

Imagine the joy of a child receiving a warm meal or a family finding comfort in a community that cares. These acts of compassion not only enrich the lives of those we help but also deepen our own sense of purpose and fulfillment. In this way, Christmas becomes a powerful catalyst for change, inspiring us to create a more compassionate world. The point to this paragraph is to think about what happens January 1st.

Traditions play a significant role in shaping our Christmas experience. From decorating the tree to singing carols, these rituals connect us to our past and to one another. However, it is essential to approach these traditions with intention.

As we engage in holiday customs, let us reflect on their significance. What do these traditions mean to us? How do they foster connection and community? By infusing our celebrations with mindfulness, we can transform routine activities into profound expressions of love and gratitude.

For instance, consider the tradition of baking cookies. Instead of viewing it as a chore, we can turn it into a cherished family event, where stories are shared, laughter abounds, and memories are created. Making chocolate chip cookies, sorry that snuck in there. By being present in these moments, we honor the spirit of Christmas and create a legacy of love that can be passed down through generations.

Ultimately, the question remains: how do we make Christmas an important moment in our lives? It begins with a conscious choice to seek meaning in the season. Rather than allowing the holiday to be defined by commercialism and superficiality, we can embrace its deeper significance.

This Christmas, let me challenge you by committing to cultivating a spirit of gratitude. Take time to reflect on the blessings in your life, the people who enrich your journey, and the lessons learned throughout the year. By fostering an attitude of gratitude, we can shift our perspective and find joy in the simple pleasures of the season.

Moreover, let us be open to the transformative power of Christmas. This holiday has the potential to inspire personal growth, healing, and renewal. Whether through acts of kindness, meaningful conversations, or moments of reflection, we can allow the spirit of Christmas to guide us toward a more profound understanding of ourselves and our place in the world.

I would like to encapsulate what is written above, so as we approach this Christmas season, let us remember that it is not merely a date on the calendar but an opportunity for profound connection, compassion, and reflection. By prioritizing relationships, embracing traditions with intention, and seeking meaning in our celebrations, we can transform this holiday into a powerful moment in our lives.

In a world that often feels divided, Christmas serves as a reminder of our shared humanity.It calls us to come together, to uplift one another, and to celebrate the beauty of life. So, as you prepare for the festivities, take a moment to reflect on what Christmas means to you. Let it be a time of love, joy, and profound connection—a season that resonates in your heart long after the decorations are taken down and the last carol has been sung.

Merry Christmas everyone, no matter how you celebrate.

The Deep End of The Pool

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With this being a spiritual time of year I have been thinking about what that means and in a world which is overflowing with beauty, pleasure, and the allure of the senses, it is easy to become sidetracked by the tangible delights that life offers. From the breathtaking landscapes to exquisite art, (which I have a passion for) the sweetness of our existence can be intoxicating. Yet, amidst all this abundance, there lies a profound truth: the pursuit of superficial pleasures often leads to a hollow existence. As St, John of the Cross wisely reflects, “I would not sacrifice my soul for all the beauty of this world.” This sentiment invites us to explore a deeper, more meaningful quest—one that transcends what we see and ventures into the heart of the Mystery.

After seeing Mirabai Starr at the Richard Rohr Conference a few months ago and having my mind blown, I thought today would be a good day to take a little journey into living life. These finite pleasures of life, while enticing, are ultimately fleeting. They may provide momentary satisfaction, but they do not nourish the soul. St. John’s assertion that “the taste of finite pleasure leads nowhere” resonates deeply in a society that often prioritizes instant gratification. We chase after experiences, possessions, and accolades, believing they will fill the void within us. However, as we indulge in these transient delights, we may find ourselves exhausted and unfulfilled, our appetites will be ravaged by the very things we sought for comfort. Have you ever felt this way?

This exhaustion is not merely physical; it is spiritual and represents two of the four quadrants. The soul, when deprived of deeper meaning, becomes weary. St John captures this sentiment beautifully: “Ordinary pleasures sicken her.” When we can awaken to the reality that our true longing cannot be satisfied by the superficial, we begin to seek something more profound—an “I-don’t-know-what” that lies hidden in the heart of the Mystery. Have you ever gone after something more profound in your life?

What is this “I-don’t-know-what”? Is it the essence of existence, the divine spark that ignites our souls and beckons us toward a greater understanding of life. Is it the call to explore the depths of our being, to confront the mysteries that lie beyond our comprehension. This journey is not for the faint of heart; it requires courage, vulnerability, and a willingness to embrace uncertainty.

Inspired by the teachings of John of the Cross, Mirabai Starr encourages us to trust the difficult path of unknowing. In her translation of John of the Cross’s poem “Glosa á lo Divino,” she illuminates the beauty and necessity of surrendering to the unknown. Starr emphasizes that the journey into the depths of the soul often involves navigating through darkness and confusion, yet it is precisely in this unknowing that we can encounter the other. St John reminds us that “the generous heart does not collapse into the easy things but rises up in adversity.” This resilience is a must in our quest for the Mystery. That which makes life worth living. It is easy to settle for the comforts of the world, to cling to what is familiar and safe. However, true growth occurs when we confront challenges and seek meaning in the face of adversity. Faith becomes our guiding light, lifting us higher as we navigate the complexities of life.

When we allow ourselves to be touched by the divine, our souls undergo a transformation. The St John describes this experience as a burning “love-longing,” a deep yearning for connection with the Mystery. Our tastes are transfigured; we no longer find satisfaction in the ordinary. Instead, we crave the extraordinary, the profound, and the sacred. Have you ever felt this?

This longing can feel like a fever, an insatiable desire that drives us to seek the ungraspable. We become aware that the pleasures we once cherished no longer hold the same allure. The sweetness of life pales in comparison to the richness of the spiritual journey. We begin to understand that true fulfillment lies not in what we can see or touch, but in what we can feel and intuit—a connection to something greater than ourselves. This is how it worked for me.

In our pursuit of the Mystery, we must remain steadfast in our commitment to authenticity. St John declares, “I will never lose myself for anything the senses can taste, nor for anything the mind can grasp.” This declaration is a powerful reminder to prioritize our inner truth over external validation. In a world that often encourages conformity and superficiality, we must resist the temptation to compromise our souls for fleeting pleasures.

Instead, we are called to embark on a journey of self-discovery, to delve into the depths of our being and uncover the unique essence that resides within us. This journey may lead us to unexpected places, challenging our beliefs and expanding our understanding of the world. Yet, it is in this exploration that we find the “I-don’t-know-what” that we seek—a profound connection to the Mystery that transcends our individual experiences.

As we navigate the complexities of this life, it is essential to embrace the journey itself. The path to the heart of the Mystery is not linear; it is filled with twists and turns, the hero’s journey, moments of doubt, and bursts of clarity. We may encounter obstacles that test our resolve, but it is through these challenges that we grow and evolve.

Mirabai Starr’s insights into John of the Cross’s teachings remind us that the journey into the unknown is not a solitary endeavor. It is a shared experience, one that connects us to the collective human experience of seeking and longing. St John’s unwavering commitment to the Mystery serves as an inspiration for us all. “I am bound for an I-don’t-know-what deep within the heart of the Mystery.” This declaration encapsulates the essence of our quest—a journey fueled by curiosity, faith, and a deep longing for connection. It invites us to step beyond the confines of our comfort zones and explore the vastness of existence.

In a world that often prioritizes the tangible and the known, the call to embrace the Mystery is both radical and transformative. It challenges us to look beyond the surface and seek the deeper truths that lie hidden within. If we embark on this journey, we may find that the beauty of life is not found in the pleasures we can taste or the accolades we can achieve, but in the profound connections we forge with ourselves, others, and the divine.

Ultimately, the quest for the “I-don’t-know-what” is a journey of the soul—a journey that invites us to risk everything for the sake of authenticity, love, and the pursuit of meaning. As we navigate the complexities of existence, may we remain open to the Mystery that awaits us, savoring the richness of life that transcends the ordinary and embraces the extraordinary. In trusting the difficult path of unknowing, we may discover that the heart of the Mystery is not a destination, but a continuous unfolding of love, wisdom, and profound connection.

Inspired by the teachings of John of the Cross, Mirabai Starr encourages us to trust the difficult path of unknowing: Starr translates John of the Cross’s poem “Glosa á lo Divino”:

I would not sacrifice my soul

for all the beauty of this world

There is only one thing

for which I would risk everything:

an I-don’t-know-what

that lies hidden

in the heart of the Mystery.

The taste of finite pleasure

leads nowhere.

All it does is exhaust the appetite

and ravage the palate.

And so, I would not sacrifice my soul

for all the sweetness of this world.

But I would risk everything

for an I-don’t-know-what

that lies hidden

in the heart of the Mystery.

The generous heart

does not collapse into the easy things,

but rises up in adversity.

It settles for nothing.

Faith lifts it higher and higher.

Such a heart savors

an I-don’t-know-what

found only in the heart of the Mystery.

The soul that God has touched

burns with love-longing.

Her tastes have been transfigured.

Ordinary pleasures sicken her.

She is like a person with a fever.

nothing tastes good anymore.

All she wants

is an I-don’t-know-what

locked in the heart of

the Mystery….

I will never lose myself

for anything the senses can taste,

nor for anything the mind can grasp,

no matter how sublime,

            how delicious.

I will not pause for beauty,

I will not linger over grace.

I am bound for

an I-don’t-know-what

deep within the heart of the Mystery.

 

Find Mirabai Starr’s work here

“Thanksgiving: Embracing Gratitude, Kindness, and Community”

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When you think of Thanksgiving, what comes to mind? For some, it’s a time of gathering with family and friends, sharing a bountiful meal, and expressing gratitude for the blessings in our lives. For me and my family, Thanksgiving always meant a trip to my Aunt Joanne’s home. She, along with my Uncle Pete and my five cousins, would orchestrate a grand feast. The menu was a culinary extravaganza: turkey, ham, pork, three kinds of potatoes, ten varieties of vegetables, gravies, breads, jellies, and five different kinds of desserts. The list seemed endless. In those days, much to my later chagrin, the women did the work while the men sat around the TV, watching football and drinking Stroh’s beer. I didn’t know enough to be irritated by that until later in life. And there were always a few “odd people out” at the table too—neighbors, a co-worker or two, and occasionally, a future spouse.

Thanksgiving was a time when we all had our parts to play in this drama of life and celebration. It was a time for giving thanks for what we had and, sometimes, remembering those who had much less. Growing up in Detroit, I had many opportunities to go downtown and volunteer to help feed those in need. These experiences taught me the true spirit of Thanksgiving: gratitude, generosity, and community.

Thanksgiving as we know it today has its roots in the early 17th century. The first Thanksgiving is often traced back to 1621, when the Pilgrims and the Wampanoag people shared a harvest feast in Plymouth, Massachusetts. This event is considered one of the first Thanksgiving celebrations in the colonies. The Pilgrims, who had endured a harsh winter and lost many of their group, were grateful for the successful harvest and the help they received from the Native Americans.

However, the concept of giving thanks and celebrating the harvest is not unique to the Pilgrims. Many cultures around the world have held similar celebrations for centuries. For example, the ancient Greeks held a festival called Thesmophoria to honor Demeter, the goddess of agriculture. Similarly, the Chinese celebrate the Mid-Autumn Festival, a time to give thanks for the harvest and the harmony of family.

Thanksgiving became an official holiday in the United States in 1863, when President Abraham Lincoln proclaimed a national day of “Thanksgiving and Praise to our beneficent Father who dwelleth in the Heavens.” Since then, Thanksgiving has been celebrated on the fourth Thursday of November.

Thanksgiving is more than just a day for feasting; it’s a time for reflection and gratitude. It’s an opportunity to pause and appreciate the blessings in our lives, both big and small. In our world going helter-skelter, it’s easy to take things for granted. Thanksgiving can remind us to slow down and be thankful for the people and experiences that enrich our lives, if we let it.

For many families, Thanksgiving is a time to come together and strengthen bonds. It’s a chance to reconnect with loved ones, share stories, and create lasting memories. The act of gathering around the table, sharing a meal, and expressing gratitude can foster a sense of belonging and community.

Thanksgiving is also a time to think about those who are less fortunate. Volunteering and giving back to the community are important aspects of the holiday. Whether it’s serving meals at a local shelter, donating to a food bank, or simply reaching out to someone in need, there are many ways to make a positive impact.

Growing up, I had the opportunity to volunteer in Detroit, helping to feed those who had so much less. These experiences were eye-opening and humbling. They taught me the importance of empathy and compassion. Volunteering not only helps those in need but also enriches our own lives by fostering a sense of purpose and connection. (“Proverbs 11:17”)

Hopefully after thanksgiving is over, we can look ahead to what’s next. It would be cool if we could carry the spirit of Thanksgiving with us throughout the year. Gratitude and kindness should not be limited to a single day, right? By embracing these values of gratitude in our daily lives, we can create a more compassionate and connected world.

I was thinking of a few ways to embed this practice in our lives every day.

Practicing mindful gratitude! You can do that by taking a few moments each day to reflect on the things you are grateful for. Sort of like an examine of conscience, this simple practice can shift your perspective and increase your overall sense of well-being.

Perform random acts of kindness! Small acts of kindness can have a big impact. Whether it’s holding the door for someone, offering a compliment, or helping a neighbor. I remember a time when in the grocery line at Kroger’s I saw this old man counting out change to pay for his food, which was meager, and he did not have enough, the woman behind him stepped in and paid for the whole bill, smiled, hugged the man and stepped back into line. I teared up.

Volunteering regularly takes effort and is not easy. Find a cause that resonates with you and commit to volunteering when you can. Whether it’s at a local shelter, school, or community center, your time and effort can make a difference.

By fostering meaningful connections, you can nurture your relationships with family and friends. Reach out to loved ones, listen actively, and show appreciation for their presence in your life. I have at times been estranged from a family member here and there and have gently reached out to reconnect with some success. Try it.

By being kind to yourself which is extending empathy and compassion to you. Practicing self-care and being gentle with you will get you through those challenging times.

Thanksgiving is a reminder of the power of gratitude and the importance of community. As we gather with loved ones and reflect on our blessings, let’s also commit to spreading kindness and compassion in our everyday lives. By doing so, we can create a more loving and connected world for ourselves and future generations.